In life, there are important subjects that can be debated to the death. Such as:
1. Which came first, the chicken or the egg?
2. Should abortion be legal?
3. Is my political party better than yours? (If you don’t share my beliefs the answer is no.)
However time and time again we are faced with the most important debate of all. Who is better, Angelina Jolie or Jennifer Aniston?
I’ll try to be as unbiased as I possibly can while going through this debate. Let’s start by going through the reasons people stereotypically pick sides. If you believe in cheating on your spouse, love to put your peep’s blood in a vial and wear it around your neck, publicly make out with your family, or want to someday raise an entire farm full of children, you’re going to side with Angie. In comparison if you are boring, want to be single your entire life, are ruining your own career because of a love lost, and would choose movie roles where you are constantly a beta female and have no power as a woman (The Break Up, He’s Just Not Into You, Love Happens, etc.), you are typically on the Jen side.
I feel awful for writing all of that, because I really do LOVE them both, but it’s all totally true so really I don’t feel bad at all.
For those of you who have lived under a rock, here are the facts. Brad was propositioned to star alongside Angie in the film, Mr. & Mrs. Smith. Arnon Milchan, the producer of the movie, released a book which revealed all of our suspicions that Brad was a total douche and was boning Angelina while he was still with Jennifer. Ok he didn’t say that exactly, but he pretty much did. Later Brad admitted to the scandal and Jen dumped his sorry ass. You go girl!
Personally, I think the whole thing is a tragedy. On top of everything, everyone calls little Jen, Jennifer “Maniston,” which is ridiculous. Have you people seen her in Horrible Bosses? The girl is HOT! Whatever…
I’ve struggled with this debate for years. I always hated Angie because I am so anti-cheating and plus, she is a FREAK. However, over time she wore on my soul and I have chosen to embrace her creepiness. The girl totally knows that everyone in the entertainment world is obsessed with her and I can respect that. PLUS does fashion mean anything in this debate? Obviously. If you saw her at the Oscar’s you know exactly what I’m talking about…but it’s like, Jennifer was on Friends so shouldn’t she win automatically?
When it comes down to it, the choice is clear. Life is only exciting when someone breaks out of the norm and makes it exciting. There is something so fascinating about controversy and Angelina always delivers it on a silver platter. Plus her imprint on fashion (and ok…the world, I guess) is the “icing on the cake” as they say. Who says that even?
This hardly seems fair. I love Jennifer Aniston, I really do, but life’s not fair. If it was, my Dad would have bought me a Camaro instead of handing me down his used Ford Escape. Aniston is probably the more morally sound in comparison. If I had to pick one of the two that I can really relate to, it would be Jen by a mile, but that is precisely why she loses. Being sweet and cute won’t win you any competitions. It’s the risk takers, envelope pushers, and trendsetters that take the prize.
At the end of the day, you can disagree with me. You are stupid, but this is America and you’re allowed to be stupid. What I can promise you, though, is that in the next year there are going to be two magazine covers on the racks at target. One will have Angelina Jolie with a crazy stunning Versace, talking about training for some assassin movie, while simultaneously producing a movie in a third world country exposing the horrors of war, all the while rasing her 5 million children. The other will have Jennifer Aniston with boyfriend Justin Theroux hanging out on their couch saying “this is great”. Who, may I ask, will you choose then?