Holiday parties are the best, aren’t they? Getting together with your closest friends, sharing stories and beers, getting naked in the hot tub and having it be completely normal, delicately planning an entire secret santa event only to accidentally break someone’s RumChata gift and having to watch everyone play the secret santa game without you …
But besides food, alcohol, and love, there is one more thing that is absolutely essential to a Christmas party well done, and that is mistletoe.
Ok yeah, I forgot to bring it to last year’s party, sue me ok I remembered everything else. But this year I will *not* forget it. And here are the five reasons why.
- Mistletoe serves as an invitation to make out with all of your friends, not like you really need an excuse to do that. But now you have one.
- Mistletoe can be used as an absolutely beautiful contribution to your holiday decor! So pretty by the stairwell or the entryway of your home.
- It is a perfect excuse to smooch your crush! Or a cute boy. Or a pretty cute boy. Or your boyfriend if you have one but you don’t because you have a huge heart but huge commitment issues. What?
- If you haven’t gotten any action in a while, you can literally trick someone into going under it with you. I like the, “Oh my gosh cute boy! There’s a spider on the floor! Right here! Can you kill it?” Followed by, “Wow I’m sorry my mistake that wasn’t a spider at all. But like, do you see where we are right now? Together? You and me? Do you think this is love?” And lay one on them. I like that approach, definitely. Let me know how that works for you.
- You can awkwardly put your friends in the super uncomfortable situation of pushing them under the door frame and proceeding to taunt them. I do this with or without mistletoe and all of my friends hate me for it. But I can’t help that I’m a proprietor of true love.
Here’s to hoping you get the smooch of a lifetime under the mistletoe this year. And if you don’t, I have seriously a ton of single friends I can set you up with so call me.